Return Culture Shock (from a note to a friend)

I remember how hard it was for me when I returned from Thailand, a group of us who'd been overseas met mornings to try and process it all. I remember putting laundry soap in the dishwasher - telling my roommates that we, Americans, have to have a different soap for everything. Then Annie (my roommate) called me into the sea of suds in our kitchen - that was a funny incident. Some of the rest was not so funny.

This time, I'm just overwhelmed by my kid's constant needs (and they're good kids). I'm a bit appalled at how I've spoiled them. Today Hannah told me that she needs a mom who's not grumpy (this was after she said her third "we need....") I'd like to steer them in a different direction but maybe without so much grumpiness. I went to Costco today and almost threw up at the sheer volume and variety. I'm frustrated at my own consumerism and how I'm tempted to just fit right back into life as before. Then I think about the women and children and their extreme need. The dirty water they drink, the huts they sleep in, the children running alongside our van, asking us to bring them clothes back.....

On the way home from Costco, I was listening to NPR and they were having a "phone in and tell us what you're thankful for." I called in and they put me on - I can only pray that what I said didn't sound condemning but rather challenging. He kind of cut me off when I told the story about the kids running alongside the van.

When we got home, we discovered that Ben's bike had been stolen out of our driveway. In the middle of the day, with the girls home and the dog barking like crazy. I can't believe how violated I feel and have been asking myself - "why am I so angry?" So you can see, I'm in a turmoil. I can only pray and trust that God is using this disequilibrium to grow me. I knew that Africa would change me - welcomed it even. So I stand on faith that God wants to use it for my good. Even in the midst of the holidays. Well, I think I'll go find a Thanksgiving Eve service to attend. I was going to join Hallack but the police report for the bike took too long...darn.

I trust your Thanksgiving will be filled with the people you love. Mine will be and for that I'm very grateful.