Bewildered

...that's how Dad looked when I came out from helping Mom and found him with his breakfast upchucked all over the nice clothes he'd put on for church. The look was sort of "what just happened?" and "what do I do now?" I got him cleaned up and back in his pajamas as quickly as possible and then tackled the floor. He's not sick very often so it took us both by surprise and I'm still wondering if it was the combination of his meds and orange juice on an empty stomach? He slept most of the day but today seems to be much better so I've made a mental note to get food in him before giving the fistful of drugs that he takes at each meal.

The bigger reminder for me is that these kinds of episodes will some day be more of the rule rather than the exception. The day when both of them need more intensive care and what if that happens simultaneously? Those are the kinds of questions / concerns that I can't solve now so am choosing to trust them to God, the One who holds the future.

This afternoon I dropped a smoothie on the floor and it splashed from one end of the kitchen to the other. This time I found the humor in being back on the floor, washing it on my hands and knees and it reminded me of my favorite book "The Christian's Secret of a Happy Life." In this 1880's classic by Hannah Whitall Smith, she talks about how our daily circumstances can be used to grow us into the likeness of Christ IF (and it's a big if) we allow them to. How do I let the little and sometimes not so little challenges affect me? This is truly my challenge and I choose to let God stretch me in uncomfortable ways. As I was mopping up the smoothie I thought of Romans 5:3-5 "And not only that, but we also boast in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not disappoint us, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit that has been given to us." And while a spilled smoothie is hardly suffering, it is a circumstance that I can choose to endure and allow character to be built by my response to it. That and all the little challenges I face in caring for mom as she despairs over her illness. My choice is to keep looking to Christ by the power of the Holy Spirit and pointing her to that hope as well. This is my calling and my daily choice - thanks be to God for the gift of His Spirit!